Okay, you know what? I’ve about had it up to here with self-centeredness. That’s something I’m finding a lot of in college which I didn’t find before (my high school was kind of the bee’s knees but anyway).
So I would just like to put a couple things out there real quick:
1) If you have wronged anyone, please don’t expect them to forgive you. Do not expect forgiveness from anyone (anyone but God, ’cause He’s the only perfect One, and sometimes us base humans just can’t.) Some people think, “Oh, that person’s really nice,” or “Oh, that person’s really patient,” and so they’ll expect that person to forgive and forget.
Coming from someone who has been called one of the nicest people some have ever known, and one of the most patient and forgiving, PLEASE DON’T EXPECT ANYTHING FROM US ESPECIALLY. Do you know how much it hurts to be a certain way – kind, or forgiving, or optimistic, or whatever – and then feel the need to personify that trait for people because that’s what people have come to expect?? It’s like when someone usually smiles whenever you see them, but they have headphones in one day and aren’t smiling, and you start freaking out because they aren’t smiling. They could be perfectly fine, but you’re having a heart attack because they’re breaking expectations. But guess what: that’s what people do. People are not always totally consistent. Don’t expect a gentleman to hold the door for you, just be happy when he does. Seriously.
2) If you apologize to someone, don’t do it in order to be forgiven. That is not an apology. An apology is for the person who was wronged.
Let me say that again: AN APOLOGY IS FOR THE PERSON WHO WAS WRONGED.
It is not a method by which the wronger gets forgiven – though, hopefully, that will be a result (but don’t expect it). Don’t go into an apology hoping to get something out of it.
When you apologize to someone, it should be a humble acknowledgment that the other person was wronged or hurt or whatever, and that you are sorry that you did it to them and that they have to suffer because of it. You do not apologize to make yourself feel better. Hopefully, that will come later. But, again, that is not why you, as the wronger, apologize. Period.
As the Willow 